Love works 24/7

Like I always tell Chris, love and relationships are work. Relationships are not something you can coast through and sit idly by when you you are in them. He has a tendency to say, "But why, I have the girl?" It's just not that simple. People change and engage in events and actions everyday. We are in relationship with the world around us, and that changes us daily--even if just minutely. While our core being is fairly constant, the events that impact upon us, change us and our views, beliefs, etc. What we wanted or desired when we were 5-yrs-old may or may not be what we desire now as adults based on what has occurred to each of us in our lives.

Not only do events change us, but our relationshis in and of themselves do as well. We rely upon those in our social support network to meet and fulfill our needs at times. When those needs are not met, we find other ways to find that resolve and bring us back to some homeostatic level. Basicly, it is about balance. Something happens and we react. After that, we need to find some way to make it back to the place of balance that we are familiar with. After a rough day, one may turn to a loved one for some solace so that the stress and tendsions of the day may be diminished as the postives are highlighted in that moment of comfort. But even a hug takes effort as the other person has to reach out to you and offer such an act. Just because you have the person you want to be with, does not mean you can sit there. Sometimes you have to stand up and outstretch your arms to offer them something they need. It's about balance of self and other.